![]() |
My Dad my idol |
![]() |
ADHD? |
So. Behavioural Disorders. When do we decide that a child has Attention Deficit Disorder (A.D.D.) I look at this disorder ask myself , Attention deficit? or Can't Concentrate Disorder? Now why could this be? I had this as a child, but at the time my school report said "David daydreams in class" or "David is easily distracted" This was true. I had no interest in the subject matter so thought about other things that were more interesting like girls, football and boxing. I had most ADD in classes I found less interesting. Seeing myself as a non academic made me focus more on sport so I was pretty good at that and was encouraged to do more of it. I also knew children who couldn't concentrate and disrupted the class by being naughty. they would be fidgety and keep talking whilst everybody else was trying to work. They would be telling jokes or taking the Micky out of the teacher or teasing other children. I now know these weren't naughty boys and girls, oh no, no way! They had a different disorder. They had Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) They were hyperactive, or as I see it IN NEED OF ATTENTION!!!.
Again this is only my uneducated opinion, but I have found in my experience if we are not feeling significant we will find a way to feel significant.If we can't be significant for being good we will find another way, or we build up a barrier so no one can hurt us. A child will misbehave at my gym and blame it on a disorder. My reaction is to make him sit out of the class or just tell him or her they don't have a disorder and get on with it. This may seem harsh but it works for me. I will talk to the child later and in fact the child will more often than not come and apologise and explain their action. I will discuss the issue at length in an attempt to convince the child there is nothing wrong with them because if you think something is wrong with you then something is, especially if you have been told sooooo many times
![]() |
Asperges? |
As with most social disorders I feel the biggest influence is upbringing or as people like to say nurture rather than nature. This is NOT as you might imagine pointing the finger of blame at parents teachers or anyone else. It is just the way society has progressed. Discipline is almost forbidden. Gone are the days of when if you were naughty and punished at school that you would be punished again at home. Teachers are now in more danger from parents than children are. In my uneducated opinion children need boundaries and once these boundaries are taken away the problems begin. Single parents must be close to outnumbering children with both parents at home. Whilst most single parents cope many relax the 'boundaries' to make up for not providing another parent.
These are my opinions and I am not saying they are correct and I welcome opinions of those who do not necessarily agree with the way I see things. I want to understand more so I can help more people.
Hi Dave, I respect everything you do with Kids and the Boxing, and i know your intentions are sound, but i have to disagree with a couple of your views, as you know my experience with an ADHD and Torrettes child has been over 15 years and i have experienced the love and violence that child can give most of the time within half an hour they cannot even remember the details of what they have done and go into denial, too many children are as you say mis-diagnosed with a disability, not a disorder, but those that undergo the full medical brain scan and are proved to suffer from a disabilty, need to be treated slightly differently in life, not, as disabled, but with understanding, so making a child with ADHD sit out of a class will only make him angry inside and could cause an explosion of temper, i have found making them do something constructive at that moment will bring there brain back into focus, it has worked for me, anyway, and in my work, i have come across many teenagers, some from respectable backgrounds, that despite every oppertunity given to turn a criminal or violent tendancy around, they will never listen, and seem destined to end up in prison, spend the time and the effort on those with a glimmer of hope, sorry about your car, and would like to see the gym continue, but again we disagree, i think you need to get youngsters involved in the Boxing as cheaply as possible, they will grow up to help get sponsors and into full paying members, you talk very positive, but sometime give the impression of dispair, you are a very respected person, but sometime you need to listen. i hope this is the sort of feedback you are looking for.
ReplyDeletedo you delete comments, as i did a lengthy comment last weekend that has disapeared ?
ReplyDeleteHi Pete. I did get your message but got it on my new phone that I don't know how to work properly. I wouldn't delete it on purpose and didn't know I had until I read your comment. I honestly do respect your views and welcome your comments and I welcome more. I think you had some very good points and it did make me think a lot over the weekend. Just like you I agreed with some comments and not with others, I will try to answer what I can remember now. I know you have had 15 years experience of dealing with someone with ADHD and I can't pretend to know how difficult it is for you and your family and when his mum said his behaviour had improved after training here I was obviously very happy. I have to add I didn't say 'all' cases are misdiagnosed I did say 'most' How could I possibly argue with the results of a brain scan? Your point about me needing to listen is valid. We all need to become better listeners.
ReplyDeleteYou also said some of my comments sound like I am in despair and you are right. This is because I am not the best at running a business and am constantly struggling to stay in business. This is something I am addressing.
One of my biggest problems financially is getting people to pay for classes. I stopped a class the other day and asked how everyone was paying because it seemed my classes were full and I was still struggling. Literally half the people in the class weren't paying. As for making the classes more affordable for children I am the cheapest gym in Banbury at £25 a month (about 75p a day) the club closest to doing what I do charges £40 a month and is clearly a better businessman than I am.
I did listen to what you wrote and I hope we stay friends and I want to help 'you know who' Like I said I am not trained in social work but my results are pretty good with the people I have worked with
Hi Dave
ReplyDeleteLong time no see old friend, I really enjoy reading your blogs and have found this one particularly interesting. i grew up and lived in Banbury and knew you very well however moved over 9 years ago although my family are still there.
My eldest son is 6 nearly 7 and has recently been diagnosed with Autistic Spectrum Disorder. He is high functionality end of the spectrum towards Aspergers. At times as you can imagine his behaviours are very challenging and his social issues can be both embarrassing and challenging he is very prone to saying socially inappropriate things at times. It was a huge boost to be told by his psychologist that he is as balanced as he currently is due to the parenting and parental support he receives however this could all change as he gets older who knows. We try to celebrate him and all his positives including his qwirks we take each day as it comes every day is a new one. I think your club would benefit him as he does have an agression problem which if channelled correctly and disciplined he could maybe turn to a positive and I may look at him joining you if it is something he would like to do. If you would like to meet him at some point to assist you with understanding a bit more on high functioning Autism and Aspergers I would be more than happy to introduce you guys! The work you do especially with children is truely inspirational it is so nice to know that people i respect really do care
Love Michelle White (we are friends on fb!)
Hi Michelle. I would love to meet your lad. Why don't you bring him down one day after school so I can get to know him before he starts training here.
ReplyDelete